A very special Valentine’s Day guest column from The Wife:
As long as I’ve known my husband, he’s been an enthusiastic golfer. It became the norm that he would take a day on a weekend and play, generally once every two months, with a fraternity alumni tournament sprinkled in here and there. Of course, this has ebbed and flowed over the years, based on the availability of golfing partners and the weather. We even tried to incorporate it into a few dates – that didn’t go so well. He kept trying to coach me.
The golf element made an easy way to buy gifts; my folks could always send golf balls for holidays or birthdays, and on more than one occasion a golf shirt from a notable course was gifted. Golf became part of our relationship and has remained as such. For his bachelor party, he played golf. For a wedding gift, his groomsmen got him a new driver (it wasn’t on the registry).
We honeymooned in San Francisco and the Monterey Peninsula, and made the pilgrimage to Pebble Beach. We got a dog. Her name is Birdie.
He became a Morning Drive devotee when Morning Joe got to be too much. If the television is on, golf is on it. There’s nothing better to have a great snooze to than the dulcet tones of golf announcers.
Obviously, all of this doesn’t put me off. I understand the draw of golf – fellowship and outdoor exercise, with the occasional beverage thrown in. The challenge of bettering yourself, competing with your partners each time you pick up a club, having an experience, and enjoying life.
There are worse habits to have, especially since my husband is able to keep it all in perspective (dog’s name aside). He doesn’t buy the newest clubs or pay huge greens fees regularly or golf every day after work. He generally sticks to public courses in the area once or twice a week, and when booking elsewhere, he tries to get an inexpensive tee time.
At times it does get hard, like when he’s able to take half-days on Fridays in the summer and hit the course while I’m stuck in my cube. I would rather be having the same thing that he does – time set aside to feed my soul, only my soul needs facials, crepes, Kate Middleton’s wardrobe and Jack Reacher books. So, when he’s out playing golf and feeding his soul, I make a point to do the same for mine.
On vacations, Dave has started bringing his clubs along. He played three times while we were in Florida last year, while I did other things, like sit by the pool and read or have a spa day. Folks would say, gosh, didn’t you want to spend time with your husband? I’d say yes, and we did! We spent more time together on the vacation than we do during a normal week! The thing is, he doesn’t like just sitting by the pool and reading a book – he wants to be doing something. And that something is preferably golf.
Dave always comes back from the course tired and happy. This summer was especially fun, as he generally improved his score each time out. It was good to hear him talk about how he’s improved from the previous week or what worked out better. I’m excited that he’s having fun and getting exercise and using golf as an outlet for physical and mental stress. It’s been neat to watch is progress and give serious thought to bettering his game. He’s happier and probably a better man and husband since he’s been golfing more regularly.
Ultimately, golf has given Dave a better perspective on life. He knows there’s more than one way to approach a shot or how to think his way out of a sticky situation, and how to keep composed when confronted with less than ideal circumstances. It’s made him a great husband and partner. I love you honey. Keep golfing!
9 thoughts on “My Husband, The Bearded Golfer”
From “moe” over at the GKL forum:
I loved it!
Many years ago I was introduced to Lee Childs books by the really nice wife of a friend. Now after reading all the Jack Reacher novels, novels about the toughest guy walking, I hear about another female Jack Reacher fan. And this one also likes it that her husband golfs!
If I was dating (God forbid), the first question I would ask would be, “have you ever heard of Jack Reacher?”
If she smiled and said yes, the pursuit would begin. Count your blessings , Dave
From “golfer1155” over at the GKL forum:
Guys I am perhaps the luckiest guy on the face of the Earth …in a moment I will tell you why. Loved the blog. That my friends is the secret to a long and happy marriage.
Now back to why I feel so lucky. I started playing golf in High School and played once in a while. When I entered the working world I played in the work league once a week and on Saturday mornings early with the same group of 20 guys or so. In 1986 I moved to Kentucky and found the price of Golf to be very affordable compared to WI golf. (still is). I joined a Men’s Golf Association and continued to play once a week and Saturdays. Hooked up with a couple of guys in 1987 and started playing 2 a week and both days on the weekend. My wife not once complained about my time playing golf. As I progressed in my work career the opportunity for “work” golf presented itself. Now I was playing in my normal games twice a week and both days on the weekend and “work” golf. Work golf has taken me from St Louis to central Wisconsin to northern Ohio to PA and West Virginia. Not once did my wife ever complain about golf. I have since cut back on the week day golf. I work 4 ten hour days so I play Sat-Sun-Mon most every week. Throw in “work” golf KGA events … KSGA Events … CKSMGA events … most of those one day Monday events and I still get to play quite a bit of golf. When we go on Vacation I rarely bring the sticks … I shop…fine dining …tours of Zoos …Museums…Wildlife areas…all places my wife likes and I never complain…. We will be married 34 years in June of this year. I am the luckiest guy on the face of the earth. AND I know it.
FYI – your husband is notoriously bad at keeping score, so take those improvements with a grain of salt.
Was. Should have said “was” bad at keeping score.
Great guest post, thanks!
Thanks, Brian. I’ve created a monster; this was the most popular topic and highest viewed day in the short history of the blog.
Looks like you have a new “co-producer” – LOL!
Thanks to everyone for reading what The Wife thinks and the kind comments. She’ll be periodically write in to (hopefully) entertain you and keep me in check.
Our daughter has become a wise woman despite having us for parents!
Love you both!