A very special Valentine’s Day guest column from The Wife:

As long as I’ve known my husband, he’s been an enthusiastic golfer. It became the norm that he would take a day on a weekend and play, generally once every two months, with a fraternity alumni tournament sprinkled in here and there.  Of course, this has ebbed and flowed over the years, based on the availability of golfing partners and the weather. We even tried to incorporate it into a few dates – that didn’t go so well.  He kept trying to coach me.

The golf element made an easy way to buy gifts; my folks could always send golf balls for holidays or birthdays, and on more than one occasion a golf shirt from a notable course was gifted.  Golf became part of our relationship and has remained as such. For his bachelor party, he played golf.  For a wedding gift, his groomsmen got him a new driver (it wasn’t on the registry).

I’m told “Bogey” is the early favorite for a name if she ever gets a little brother or sister.

We honeymooned in San Francisco and the Monterey Peninsula, and made the pilgrimage to Pebble Beach. We got a dog.  Her name is Birdie.

He became a Morning Drive devotee when Morning Joe got to be too much.  If the television is on, golf is on it.  There’s nothing better to have a great snooze to than the dulcet tones of golf announcers.

Obviously, all of this doesn’t put me off.  I understand the draw of golf – fellowship and outdoor exercise, with the occasional beverage thrown in.  The challenge of bettering yourself, competing with your partners each time you pick up a club, having an experience, and enjoying life.

There are worse habits to have, especially since my husband is able to keep it all in perspective (dog’s name aside). He doesn’t buy the newest clubs or pay huge greens fees regularly or golf every day after work. He generally sticks to public courses in the area once or twice a week, and when booking elsewhere, he tries to get an inexpensive tee time.

At times it does get hard, like when he’s able to take half-days on Fridays in the summer and hit the course while I’m stuck in my cube.  I would rather be having the same thing that he does – time set aside to feed my soul, only my soul needs facials, crepes, Kate Middleton’s wardrobe and Jack Reacher books.  So, when he’s out playing golf and feeding his soul, I make a point to do the same for mine.

If you need him on a Sunday afternoon, you should start by looking here first.

On vacations, Dave has started bringing his clubs along.  He played three times while we were in Florida last year, while I did other things, like sit by the pool and read or have a spa day.  Folks would say, gosh, didn’t you want to spend time with your husband?  I’d say yes, and we did!  We spent more time together on the vacation than we do during a normal week!  The thing is, he doesn’t like just sitting by the pool and reading a book – he wants to be doing something.   And that something is preferably golf.

Dave always comes back from the course tired and happy.  This summer was especially fun, as he generally improved his score each time out.  It was good to hear him talk about how he’s improved from the previous week or what worked out better.  I’m excited that he’s having fun and getting exercise and using golf as an outlet for physical and mental stress.  It’s been neat to watch is progress and give serious thought to bettering his game.  He’s happier and probably a better man and husband since he’s been golfing more regularly.

Ultimately, golf has given Dave a better perspective on life.  He knows there’s more than one way to approach a shot or how to think his way out of a sticky situation, and how to keep composed when confronted with less than ideal circumstances.  It’s made him a great husband and partner.  I love you honey.  Keep golfing!